Life is a game of waiting.. Waiting for the right ride to take us off to the sunset

Friday, July 29, 2005

Been quite low on spirits recently. Frens who had me on the msn should know what I mean. Anyway, the lyrics of this song suit me the best now.

Talk

oh brother i can't, i can't get through
I've been trying hard to reach you cos i don't know what to do
oh brother i can't believe its true
i'm so scared about the future and i want to talk to you
oh i want to talk to you

you can take a picture of something you see
in the future where will i be?
you could climb a ladder up to the sun
or write a song nobody had sung
or do something that's never been done

are you lost or incomplete
do you feel like a puzzle, you can't find your missing piece
tell me how you feel
well i feel like they're talking in a language i don't speak
and they're talking it to me

so you take a picture of something you see
in the future where will i be?
you could climb a ladder up to the sun
or write a song nobody had sung
or do something that's never been done
do something that's never been done

so you dont know where you're going but you wanna talk
but you feel like your going where you've been before
you'll tell anyone who'll listen that you've feel ignored
nothings really making any sense at all
lets talk
lets talk

lets talk
lets talk

You can take a picture of something you see. In the future where will I be?
12:17 AM

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Just bought some fishes from a store at Blk 85. Yup. It is the same block as in the famous Blk 85 Bar Chor Mee. I think that Aunty must like me. Here is a guy who know nuts about fish rearing and had spent close to $20 on just 2 visit. See, the first time I went there, I was very enthusiastic about fish rearing. There is a small fish tank at my office and I always pity those 3 small fishes there. I mean u will be bored if you only have 2 friends on the world right?? So as usual, I decided to KayPoh aka poke my nose into fish rearing.

I bought 3 bigger size fishes(they call it Tecra) and happily dumped them into the fish tank. There was 6 fishes then. 3 Tecra and 3 Guppies. Seeing that they were living quite happily(never quarrel what) for about 3 days, I decided to add more fishes in. I bought another 5 Tecra and 1 Leopard Fish(Sucker fish). Again I dumped them in. It was then the Horror Fish Rearing Experience begins.

First mistake. Never ever mix Tecra with Guppies. One of my Tecra had his fin bitten off within 2 hours of arrving there. A bit of suspicion clouded my mind but heck, I was busy that day. So I just carry on with my work. Decided to wash the fish tank up after work as the tank really stank and the water was cloudy. So I happily went about washing the tank up that I think my Mum will kill me seeing how hard it is to get me to wash the dishes up at home. Took about 30 mins to finish the job(Single and no life what) and happily dump the fishes back into their new home. Big Mistake. S'pore water is too clean for them(too much chlorine in the bloody tapwater) To my horror, all but 5 fishes survive the ordeal of staying in water with too much chlorine when I was back the next day. This was from a total of 13 fishes. 2 of the fishes were sucker fish as they are known to be tough. To my sadness, the new sucker fish die before the day had ended. That let me with 4 fishes including 1 sucker fish. This was to change to 1 Tecra(I named it the Killer and Survivor cause it bit off the fin of the other 2 fishes and survive the chlorine) and 1 sucker fish. I was nicknamed the Fish Killer from then on.

I never made the same mistakes twice. I had left water from noon onwards for tomorrow(so that the chlorine will disper). I will wash the fish tank tomorrow before dumping the clorine disinfected water into the tank. I will also release the fishes slowly in(they need time to adapt to the new water and enviroment). I had bought 10 small Tecra at $2 for my experiment. If they can survive the Killer cum Survivor, then will I buy more. I had also one new Leopard Fish to help the old sucker fish in his job(Eating shit aka Jiak Sai). I got one small filter so as to clear the dirt and algae from the tank(which might be one of the problems causing the disaster) and also 1 water plant. The water plant can give off oxygen and also allow the fishes places to hide and play with. Not to mention it will also beautify the fish tank. The only thing that I had miss out was the solution which is supposed to heal fishes and clear chlorine. Ran out of money as my budget was $10(though I spent $11.50) in the end. All this is done in preparation for a future fish tank in my home. Yes. I am going to rear fish soon. Apologizes to my friends who I had mocked at for rearing fishes. Watching the fishes swimming around in the tank is really good for destressing. And I am a man in STRESS. Wish me all the luck. They must not die on me again.

You can take a picture of something you see. In the future where will I be?
9:51 PM

Sunday, July 17, 2005

I had finally turned 25. I would like to thank all my friends who had wished me Happy Birthday in anyway. A sms or a greeting on MSN. I really appreciated it. Thanks. Not sure if I should be happy or worry about turning 25. See, I should be getting more successful in both my career and love when I am at this stage of life but this is not the case. My current job doesn't really let me see much light for the future. As for my love life, I think I will just see what that someone up there had in store for me. Spent my birthday with my colleagues. Went for a very nice steamboat dinner opposite Beach Rd cinema before proceeding to KBox for some singing. Really appreciated it as i am not that into celebration of birthday. Birthday to me is like a reminder that another year had passed and I am still so far away from my dreams.

The main topic that was on everyone mind should be the NKF issue. I am a NKF regular donor. My monthly contribution to them is $15 dating back to 2003 when I was in the army. I was shocked when I first heard the truth follow by anger and now sympathy for the patients. I think this should be a lesson and wake up call to S'poreans that we must have more initative in knowing where are our donations going to. We are kind hearted by nature but in the same time, lazy. What if the article in Straits Times had never appeared? We will just be contributing to a man who seems to have a fetish for golden taps, first class air tickets and a fleet of mercedes benz cars for his usage. I kinda pity that guy now. I have no qualms with the high pay he was receiving. But why the 12 months bonus? Even our Prime Minister and his cabinet never received more than 2 months of bonuses. Having a golden tap that cost $900 is really insensitive. There are familes out there who can't even get a single dip of water out of their normal tap. $900 can help them clear of their debts and move on with their lives. The final straw was the lying of actual patients figurs and number of years the reserves can last. Why do that? There are other charities out there that is crying out for some donations too. The best thing that came out of this episode was the resignation of the whole board(who actually allow all this to go on and to the extent of standing behind their CEO when the whole thing was out in the open) and the CEO himself.

Power and greed goes hand in hand. The more power you have, the more things you will want. NKF is a very good example of this. They had simply grown into one of the biggest organisation in S'pore. With all the power in the hands of one man and a board that have business connection with him, this is a recipe for disaster. Men will never know how much they want. If only we know to be content and satisfied with what we have. The irony of this whole episode is that all these facts will not come to the face of light if Mr Durai had not taken a lawsuit against SPH. Seems like justice still exist in our world.

I think I will be channeling my regular donation to other organisation that need it more. I am not saying I won't donate to NKF ever again. We can't wipe away all the good that they had done just because of mistakes made by Mr Durai and the board. I hope that the new CEO and board will ensure that there will be more transparency in the usage of donor money. They might need some time to recover from this blow but I am sure that they will be able regain donors' trust in times to come.

You can take a picture of something you see. In the future where will I be?
11:10 PM

Sunday, July 10, 2005

The first dedication goes out to a friend of mine who had been down in the dumps recently. Not sure if dumps is too harsh a word but she should be more cheerful and optimistic in life. Times may be tough but try to keep ur spirits up. This is the lyrics of one of my fav song from Coldplay latest album(which I got it on my own cause I know no one will bother to buy birthday gift for me)

Fix You- Coldplay

When you try your best, but you don't succeed
When you get what you want, but not what you need
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

When the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone, but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

High up above or down below
When you too in love to let it go
If you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Next up is for the poor victims of the London bombing. Once again innocent lifes were caught in a mindless war of idealogy. Why can't we just live in peace? The timing of the attack was also bad. It happened just as the G8 leaders were meeting to see if they can write off the debts of Africa, increase aid to them and also to make sure fair trade is ongoing there. It is also for the benefits of African Muslims, the very people of the same religion which the terrosits are say to be fighting for. The attack will only result in more money being spent on better weapons and armoury when what the world need now is a better place for us to live in. Is there a big difference between a bomb that can kill 10000 and 100000? I not sure on that. All I know is that there will be a difference if 100000 people is saved from poverty than 10000. Just give peace a chance.

Give Peace a Chance - John Lennon

Ev'rybody's talking about
Bagism, Shagism, Dragism, Madism, Ragism, Tagism
This-ism, that-ism
Isn't it the most
All we are saying is give peace a chance
All we are saying is give peace a chance

Ev'rybody's talking about
Ministers, Sinisters, Banisters and canisters,
Bishops and Fishops and Rabbis and Pop eyes,
And bye bye, bye byes.
All we are saying is give peace a chance
All we are saying is give peace a chance

Let me tell you now
Ev'rybody's talking about
Revolution, Evolution, Mastication, Flagelolation, Regulations.
Integrations, Meditations, United Nations, Congratulations
All we are saying is give peace a chance
All we are saying is give peace a chance

Oh Let's stick to it
Ev'rybody's talking about
John and Yoko, Timmy Leary, Rosemary, Tommy smothers, Bob Dylan,
Tommy Cooper, Derek Tayor, Norman Mailer, Alan Ginsberg, Hare Krishna,
Hare Krishna
All we are saying is give peace a chance
All we are saying is give peace a chance

The long and winding road - Beatles

The long and winding road that leads to your door
Will never disappear
I've seen that road before it always leads me here
Leads me to your door

The wild and windy night that the rain washed away
Has left a pool of tears crying for the day
Why leave me standing here, let me know the way
Many times I've been alone and many times I've cried
Anyway you'll never know the many ways I've tried
And still they lead me back to the long and winding road
You left me standing here a long, long time ago
Don't leave me waiting here, lead me to you door

But still they lead me back to the long and winding road
You left me standing here a long, long time ago
Don't keep me waiting here (Don't keep me wait), lead me to you door

You can take a picture of something you see. In the future where will I be?
8:54 PM

Friday, July 08, 2005

Just did a test just now. The results are quite accurate. It is kinda Shen Qi. The url is at http://drawapig.desktopcreatures.com/draw.asp? f_600>. Go try it. My results are as like below:

Toward the middle, you are a realist.(Quite true. Same feel towards relationship. That's why I always admire people and not chase them as I know that I wouldn't stand a chance. I am being realistic.)

Facing front, you are direct, enjoy playing devil's advocate and neither fear nor avoid discussions. (Quite true ba. I dun like to beat around the bush.)

With few details, you are emotional and naive, they care little for details and are a risk-taker. (No comments on the emotional and naive but risk taker.. Maybe ba.)

With less than 4 legs, they are insecure or are living through a period of major change. (No comments)

The size of the ears indicates how good a listener you are.
The bigger the better. You drew medium sized ears, you are a good listener (Should be as I got a few friends who can only chat with me online and not willing to meet up with me. Maybe my looks turn them off?? ;) )

The length of the tail indicates the quality of your sex life.
And again more is better! You did not draw a tail :) (Let's just take it that I sucks at drawing and I was lazy. :P )

You can take a picture of something you see. In the future where will I be?
12:15 AM

Sunday, July 03, 2005

Yes. The title sums it all. I am blogging this from a cyber cafe called Raiders located at Causeway Point. No, I am not doing an advertisment for them. It is just that in order to bond with my lovely niece and active nephew, I got to resort to this. See, my last visit to a cyber cafe was in 2003. Still serving the nation and thus free like a bird. First of all, how can we be sure that all the birds in the world are free? Let's take the crows in S'pore for example. They sure are a busy lot. Trying to snap on our food the moment we are not around, attack us when we are walking past their bloody tree and also having to fend off people who are paid to shoot them. So do you think they are free now?? Kinda out of topic. Sorry.

Anyway, I finally paid them a long overdue visit. In the 6 months that I never seen them, my niece grades had fallen to below average and my nephew had became an expert in an arcade game called Intial D. The reason for her poor grades is due to a game they are playing beside me as I am typing away. Maple. I tried my hand at the game and seriously, I think the game is boring. You just walk around and try to slaughter anyone in front of you. A no brainer. No wonder her grades are getting worse. Anyway, I had already warned her as this is her O levels year and I have high expectation of her. No way is a grade of 24 for L1R4 consider good.

Speaking of today, I think I must have spent quite an amount on them. Bringing them to visit my Grandma(Who loved them more than she loved me), dinner at Pasta mania(where the pasta is just getting worse and worse) and now playing mindless LAN game with them. Hopefully they will do as I advise after all these treats.

See, I am worried for my niece as she is now at the stage where there is peer pressure to get a bf. She did told me that she don't have a bf yet and I really do hope that she is telling the truth. See as a guy, I know how bastard guys can be when they want to. Point taken when something drastic just happened to a very close female friend of mine. She is one of the few female friends that I will do my utmost to protect as I had known her since I was 15. I can't disclose much but let's just say that her ex bf had just done every God DAMN thing that guys shouldn't do. It is because of men like him that I worry for my niece. See, I know that in life, there are lessons and falls that one must take on their own. But still I hope that life won't be too hard on them. I may be selfish here but I think they really deserve the best in life. They had already lost their mum at a tender age, a Dad who simply don't have time for them and an Uncle who is not doing a good job. I rememeber promising my sis at her death bed to take care of Grandma(which I fail miserably), Dad(who I don't really give a damn) and the two of them. I think I kinda let her down. To a point that if she was to look for me in my dreams, I don't know how I should answer to her. I really hope that things turn out well for them.

I think they will be able to do that as they seems to have that independence spirit that runs in the family. You know like fending for oneself, applying for bursary to supplement their allowance and taking care of each other. Anyway, please let me know if anyone of you has ten year series. The book which used to strike fear in us during the O levels year. I need it for my niece. She need to start doing them now cause I can't see anyway she will do well if she keep to her own method of doing what is on the textbook. I got to go back to that mindless game again. Maple!!!!

You can take a picture of something you see. In the future where will I be?
8:37 PM