Sunday, February 27, 2005
Ya here I am again. Blogging at this unholy hour. Well being at home the whole day might cause your brains to be out of sorts. Not being able to sleep at night and not wanting to wake up in the morning. Come to think of it, I have been like that for the whole of the week. Seems like being "unemployed" is so boring. Nothing to look forward to in the morning and nothing for you to look forward to after your work. Plus the fact that you are single kinda makes it worse. I am not lamenting the fact that I am single. I am lamenting the fact that I seems to have run of activities to do with my friends and in life. I feel like going on a backpack trip. The sad fact is that I can't even afford to go JB, what's more backpacking. I feel like doing volunteer work but it feels ironic when I can't even find a job for myself. What's more help people doing work. The things that I have been doing too much. Watching soccer(betting on it and losing :'( ), playing warcraft(dreaming about how to pass the stage), talking cock with my gang when we hang out(which is like everyday), eating and sleeping(which is making me look like a pig now)
Let's see. How can I or maybe we find happiness? This post is kinda ironic cause I had just donated $14 to Singapore Pools. plus the fact that I got a letter from our Traffic Police reminding me that I owe them a sum of $20 only makes it worse. I know $34 is not much to some of you here but to an "unemployed" man, it is. Had a chat just now with a friend of mine(Ex Crush). Amazing that she was the one giving me advice. I mean she is way younger than me. I guess this means that maturity doesn't come with age.
Happiness for me now I think is to get a stable income, do something meaningful with it and be a good adviser to my clients even though I am not a full time adviser. And for my friends who know about it, to make Looking Glass Models a success. I am quite sure that Looking Glass is on the right track. We just need a few breaks and I am sure we will be on our way to the top. ;)
You can take a picture of something you see. In the future where will I be?
4:36 AM
4:36 AM
Friday, February 25, 2005
If you are wondering why this blog was posted at an unholy hour of 5 a.m, I think you must be one of the lucky souls who have a lifesaver called the aircon in your room. People still relying on a third world equipment called the fan should understand what I am trying to say. Well, I can't blame it fully on the weather. Two late nights of watching The Champions League had make me a night owl. How I wish I can earn enough to install a bloody aircon in my room.
Haven't been doing much for the past week. Done some work on Sat and Tues and the rest of my time was spend playing WarCraft3. I never expect it to be that addictive. I know some of you might say that I am a bit late to play it now. Well, I had a pirated copy of it when it was first released a few years back. But as all trusted pirated cd does, it was a spoilt one. Turn me off from getting it again until a trip to JB some weeks ago with my friends. Was thinking of what to get for myself cause I don't wanna travel "overseas" just for the food(no doubt it is nice and cheap). Finally decided on getting WarCraft3 since I am idling at home then and the only game I played was Football Manager(Another highly addictive game) Now my normal day consist of playing WarCraft3 and slacking. But I am quite hopeful of starting work soon. Hopefully cause I do have bills and debts to pay.
Well, back to my main topic today. Love. Read The Newpaper on Sunday and was surprised to find a special report on S'pore men. It had actually billed S'pore Men as LongKang fish. It ramble about how S'pore women find S'pore men as being unromantic, selfish, boring and being a mummy boy. Let's just say that I wasn't surprised that the reporters for the special report were ladies. I mean give us guys a break. Are we mummy boys? How will you ladies react if your elder and younger brothers said that they are going to listen to whatever their gfs tell them and that include not taking care of your mum. No way are you going to say well done right? I am quite sure you will bitch about how evil his gf is.(All gals bitch) Now for the romance part. No way can the local guys fight with the foreign expats which are paid almost twice what we are earning. More income earned mean more chances to be romantic. Let's face it. You want romance? You definitely need the $$ to do it. End of the day, if we do not have $$ would you still choose us? I think it is high time that local ladies reflect on themselves too. I mean guy slamming is one thing but no way can you run away from the reality that there are an increasing number of local guys who prefer overseas talent. Will the guy slamming help all those single ladies out there? I doubt so. I think this is more of a case of the teapot calling the kettle black.
I think being in love is just like taking a bus. Where will the bus bring you to? Who will be at the next stop for you shall the bus decide to change the route that it had originally planned? Some buses might bring you to where you want in life while others might just bring you to the next stop before proceeding on to another stop which might not be what you want in life. I for one is hoping that the next bus that I take will be a one ride ticket to where I want in my life. And I hope that all those who is already onboard a bus that it will be one smooth ride to where you want to go. :)
They are both convinced that a sudden passion joined them.
Such certainty is beautiful, but uncertainty is more beautiful still.
You can take a picture of something you see. In the future where will I be?
4:58 AM
4:58 AM
Monday, February 14, 2005
Well well. Tomorrow is Valentine day. I don't know what is the big deal about it. It is just one of those commercialised holidays out there. The best part about it is that it is not even a holiday. It is not even a festival if I can recall. Who will like Valentine day? I am sure the florist will love it the most. I mean when the hell can you charge up to $90 for a bouquet or rose. Gals who are attached will also love it. It will give them an "offical" reason to get a gift from their boyfriend. Restuarant owners will love it. It is not everyday you can pose off an ordinary set meal as a "Couple Meal" and jack up the price. The reason I mentioned above so far are all related to $$. Anyway, I am sure the economy won't mind the couple brigade from spending allof their pay on gifts for their bf or gf.
You guys might be wondering how I am going to spend my day tomorrow then. I will be doing my rounds of my friends' home for more Hong Baos. I am practically living off them now. So if any of you out there want me to visit you, just give me a buzz. I will definitely be there. I am not slamming Valentine Day just because I am single. Even if I have a gf, I think i will just have a simple meal with her. No need to lavish gifts or go cluttering with the tons of lovers out there. A simple nice meal at home and a small exchange of sweet gifts will do just fine. As for the roses, let's just say I am not a great believer in flowers. I am quite sure the $ that goes into flowers can be better spent on something more useful. Anything that won't wilter and die after 4 days is useful.
Lost some money over the CNY period but then again, I always lose. I am quite sure that is the main reason why my friends all love it when I am going to visit them during CNY. They saw a shadow of Cai Shen Ye in me. I am not going to gamble in cards anymore during this period. Mahjong maybe cause I like the game but screw BlackJack!! How the hell you play when all you get is 12,13,14 and 15??!!??
Anyway, Happy Valentine to all those people who have a date tomorrow. Do treasure he or her as I am sure he or she is quite serious about you. If not he wouldn't spend this quite important period to couple with you. Have fun. ;)
You can take a picture of something you see. In the future where will I be?
12:53 AM
12:53 AM
Wednesday, February 09, 2005
Wow, been quite sometime since I last blogged. My neighbours are playing mahjong as I am blogging this. I know cause they are part of the reason I am still awake now. Not that I can't play it. Had the chance to join some friends for a game but decided against it. Don't wanna make them feel down cause of me. Chinese New Year to me is just like any ordinary day. It used to be very important and one of the festival that I will look forward to. I said used to cause ever since Grandpa had left me, Mum hadn't been really cooking reunion dinner. Relatives also hadn't really been visiting us as Grandpa is no longer around. I still remember that when I was young, I would look forward to it as it was a day that I can receive Hong Baos from both Mum and Grandpa. Reunion dinner will be quite a big affair as Grandpa is very particular about food, just like me. There will be fish(hate it but Grandpa loves it), chicken, prawns, duck and also soup. Mum will spent the whole day preparing for it. We will always need about 2 to 3 days to finish all the food cause there will only be the three of us eating it. We will have dinner together before she rushes off to temples for her annual prayer. I used the word temples because she will normally go to two or more temples. I will then spent the rest of the night watching TV with Grandpa. I will wait till he go to sleep before joining Weiguo, Muquan and the rest of the gang for movie or just hang around for the New Year. All this came to a halt when Grandpa fell into a coma when he was hospitalised for a normal checkup. I remember I spent the Chinese New Year Eve of 2000 at Tan Tock Seng Hospital. There was no reunion dinner nor any form of celebration of Chinese New Year. Till now I am still haunted by this incident. If only I had never convinced him to go for the checkup. He might still be here with me celebrating Chinese New Year. I really missed him. Whenever Chinese New Year come, this feeling just get stronger and stronger. Let's just said that ever since he moved on, Chinese New Year to me is just a normal day. I wouldn't say hate it cause I am sure Grandpa wouldn't want that from me. Mum had also stopped cooking reunion dinner cause there are just the 2 of us. She will be having vegetarian food for the first 3 days of the New Year so it is quite stupid of her to cook so much food for me alone. So my dinner for tonight was a plate of Steamed Chinese Sausage and 5 pieces of Fried Fillets. I don't blame her for this. I had actually suggested her to scrape the cooking. I will just eat takeaway from KFC and McDonalds for this week. I did that last year. P.S: I hate Fast Food ESP Burgers from McDonalds.
Spent the whole of Mon afternoon at East Coast with my colleagues. Was pondering whether I should go at first but glad that I had joined them. I finally mastered RollerBlading. ;) Though I fell like countless times but still glad as I am better at it than before. Wouldn't call myself an expert. Let's just said that I was able to blade from East Coast McDonalds to Bedok Jetty. And it was a two way trip. :)
Anyway, I bumped into my ex on Sun. I don't know how to describle that feeling but to see her again after 3 years apart just felt like time had suddenly stopped for me. Memories of how we used to spent time hanging out together came rushing back. I didn't acknowledge her as she was with a guy. Could that guy be her bf? I really don't know though I wished that I had asked then. All I did was to look at her from afar. Following her every step with that guy. I lost track of her when I was blocked off by a bunch of teenagers Lians and Bengs. Is it very cool for them to block the entire escalator for themselves? I can understand them for being not that smart and rowdy but to be inconsiderate is something I can't forgive. Though I had started hanging out with Lizhen, the moment I saw her make me realize one very important thing. The reason why I ended up with her rather than Lizhen. She was my counsellor and adviser when I was chasing Lizhen back in Poly days. She would console me and give me advice whenever I was down. I would down the same for her as she was in love with another guy too at that time. The reason I picked her was because she really loved me then. The concern I had from her was something I could never sense in any others gals that I had met. Not even Lizhen. She was aloof at that time. Someone once asked me whether I still like Lizhen. To be honest, I really don't know. It is like a guy thing. The one that got away is always the one you want most. Cause you never have a chance to have it before.
I think someone up there is playing tricks with me. To let me see the gals that I had liked before one by one is a sick joke. I thought I had moved on. I not sure whether I still have feelings for Lan(My Ex) but I felt the most comfortable when I was with her. I felt at ease whenever I was with her. She is a typical Virgo. Everything that she does is planned carefully. She is also not one that will give in easily(unlike me) and most important of all, she is damn good with money. Let's just say that the period that i was with her, I never really had a big problem with my finances. Whenever I go on date with girls after her, I will use her as a benchmark at times. I thought I had left it all behind. I am at a lost now. I just hope that I can get that Sales Exec job with Yellow Pages and start working. Your mind tend to wander around when you are unemployed.
Anyway, back to the main topic. Hope that I didn't bored you guys with my whining of my Chinese New Year. Gong Xi Fa Cai. All the best for the upcoming days ahead. To all my friends who smsed me, thanks a lot. The reason why I never replied was that I don't want to be another user jamming up the network. ;) And to Weiguo. Thanks for calling me to show your concern. Last but not the least, wishing everyone who see this a Happy Chinese New Year. Wang Shi Ru Yi. ;)
You can take a picture of something you see. In the future where will I be?
5:05 AM
5:05 AM
